Monday, July 09, 2007

Free Willie 

I just became re-aquainted with this guest post I did on Rob's Blog in 2003:


Today’s entry comes from Porchsleeper bassist Zac Johnson. Porchsleeper’s new CD “Every Day Is Better Than The Next” is in stores now. Pick it up. Or die.

The name Willie Nelson means a great many things to many people:

Singer, Songwriter, Guitarist, Producer, Arranger, Actor, Activist, Genius, Father, Teacher, Brother, Sister, Pool Player, Card Shark, Pool Cleaner, Card Cleaner, Sandwich Artist, Licensed Electrician, Rodeo Clown, Portrait Artist, Smoothie’s Shaving Cream Spokesman, Raconteur, Thespian, Homo Sapien, Shotgun Willie, The Red-Headed Stranger, “Ol’ Two Eyes,” Mrs. Julio Iglesias, Righty, Smokey, The Dude With The Hole In His Guitar, That One Guy, “Mr. I.R.S. Troubles,” Stinky, Pinchy, Chachi, The Outlaw, The Highwayman, The Road Warrior, “Booty Time” Nelson, Chong, “Sparky,” Bill, Uncle Willie, Country Willie, Farmer Willie, Little Willie, Boxcar Willie, Free Willie (Penny totally thought of this one today), Dr. William Hugh Nelson PHD, “Ol’ Goofy,” Captain Fire-Britches, Poopy (or “Poopie” depending on who you ask), “Le Fartist�,” Ol’ 1040, Hairy, “Bandana-Man,” Grandmaster Flash (no relation), Sugarplum, 348-07-0658 (Social Security Department only), The Poor Man’s Buck Owens, The Rich Man’s Buckminster Fuller, The Earthbound Buck Rogers, The Buck Stops Here, Bucket O’ Chicken, Ol’ Bucket O’ Chicken Nelson, Half-Nelson, Mousetrap, CandyLand, Ol’ Chutes N’ Ladders Nelson, Big Poppa, Lil’ Bow Wow, Cultural Ambassador to Jamaica, Prime Minister of Willierovia (Honorary), “The Duder,” Occasional Cartoonist For The New Yorker, Ghost Writer For Atlantic Monthly, The Ghost of John Ritter, The Wreck Of The Edmund Fitzgerald, Austere, Contemplative, Reflective, Quite Possibly Stoned, Stone-Faced, Rigid, Craggy, Ribbed For Her Pleasure, Gentle, Softly As In A Morning Sunrise, The Real Thing, “The Quicker Picker Upper,” Tougher Than Leather, The Troublemaker, The Electric Horseman, The Minstrel Man, My San Antonio Rose, The Dinosaur, Australopithecus, Moody, Sensitive, Romantic, Open, Free With The Smooches, A Little Tighter With The Wallet, Beardy, Braidy…the list goes on.

but to me, his name will always mean one thing: Ol’ Bucket O’ Chicken Nelson.

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