Monday, August 15, 2005

Lotsa ninjas today 



PorchJimmer
Come out this Friday August 19th to The Elbow Room in Ypsi to see Porchsleeper perform a handful of songs as Jim Roll's backing band. Sounds crazy, but it just might work.
Also performing: Counter Cosby and Embassy Hotel Recording Artists Paul's Big Radio.
Show Starts at 9, We'll go on around Midnight.

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Oh my God Earl, you have got to see This Video crammed with what must be every single redneck image known to man, set to the sounds of Eric Weissberg's Dueling Banjos.
Yep, the Raccoon humping the dog is in there too.

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OK here is what may be the first ever DataWhat Challenge: Watch This entire video without looking away from the screen. Nothing jumps out at you, nothing screams like those little "Screamer" videos with Ghosts or barking dogs or whatever, it is just a simple video of a person tap dancing, then looking into the camera. Just stare at the whole thing, I dare you. Look into the face that will be looking back at me from behind the wall of sleep tonight.
Not advisable for pregnant women, you might accidentally spontaniously have the baby out of sheer creepiness.

For a lighter look, here is the YoureTheManNowDog version set to the Benny Hill theme.
Ha Ha! Yakkity Sax!

More information on the origins of this fascinating person Here

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Funniest thing of the day: This guy totally messes with people wasting their time in CyberSex chat rooms:

Bloodninja: I lick your earlobe, and undo your watch.
Sarah19fca: mmmm, okay.
Bloodninja: I take yo pants off, grunting like a troll.
Sarah19fca: Yeah I like it rough.
Bloodninja: I smack you thick booty.
Sarah19fca: Oh yeah, that feels good.
Bloodninja: Smack, Smack, yeeeaahhh.
Bloodninja: I make some toast and eat it off your ass. Land O' Lakes butter all in your crack. Mmmm.
Sarah19fca: you like that?
Bloodninja: I peel some bananas.
Sarah19fca: Oh, what are you gonna do with those?
Bloodninja: get me peanuts. Peanuts from the ballpark.
Sarah19fca: Peanuts?
Bloodninja: Ken Griffey Jr. Yeaaaaahhh.
Sarah19fca: What are you talking about?
Bloodninja: I'm spent, I jump down into the alley and smoke a fatty. I throw rocks at the cats.
Sarah19fca: This is stupid.
Bloodninja: Stone Cold Steve Austin gives me some beer.
Bloodninja: Wanna Wrestle Stone Cold?
Bloodninja: Yeeaahhhh.
Sarah19fca: /ignore
Bloodninja: Its cool stone cold she was a bitch anyway.
Bloodninja: We get on harleys and ride into the sunset.

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Ted Nugent on Hardball talking about the new Rolling Stones song and political activism in music:

About 4 minutes into it:

“If you watched what Uncle Ted is doing at all this State Fairs and County Fairs…when I go into my pro-gun self-evident truth celebration…my pro-hunting, my pro-trapping….when I talk about quality of life issues….the ten commandments, the golden rule, the U.S. constitution, the Bill of Rights….50,000 people at the state fair all scream “Yes!”

“yeah REM and The Beastie Boys they’re going to change the vote! Those guys are a LAUGH! They’re pathetic! They’re hippies and basically nutcases. I mean, they’re not going to have any political impact whatsoever! They’re a joke!”

“And Green DAY! They’re all about MASCARA!!!”

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Terrific commercial by Steve Balmer selling Windows 1.0...must be from 1985.
It's $99, but it comes with a clock, so that's cool.

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Have The Darkness Broken Up?
A dark day for rock my friends...

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This is a pretty choice little movie about a guy using Le Parkour-style jumps and manuvers to escape some bad guys.
Like Jackie Chan, but more "street"...

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The best one liners from the Pam Anderson Roast
"Who thinks Courtney Love looks worse than Kurt Cobain currently does?" - Jeffrey Ross

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Ultimate Power

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OK, just one more from BloodNinja:

Bloodninja: Wanna cyber?
MommyMelissa: Sure, you into vegetables?
Bloodninja: What like gardening an ****?
MommyMelissa: Yeah, something like that.
Bloodninja: Nuthin turns me on more, check this out
Bloodninja: You bend over to harvest your radishes.
(pause)
MommyMelissa: is that it?
Bloodninja: You water your tomato patch.
Bloodninja: Are you ready for my fresh produce?
MommyMelissa: I was thinking of like, sexual acts INVOLVING vegetables... Can you make it a little more sexy for me?
(pause)
Bloodninja: I touch you on your lettuce, you massage my spinach... Sexily.
Bloodninja: I ride your buttocks, like they were amber waves of grains.
MommyMelissa: Grain doesn't really turn me on... I was thinking more along the lines of carrots and zucchinis.
Bloodninja: my zucchinis carresses your carrots.
Bloodninja: Damn baby your right, this s**t is HOT.
MommyMelissa: ...
Bloodninja: My turnips listen for the soft cry of your love. My insides turn to celery as I unleash my warm and sticky cauliflower of love.
MommyMelissa: What the f**k is this madlibs? I'm outta here.
Bloodninja: Yah, well I already unleashed my cauliflower, all over your olives, and up in your eyes. Now you can't see. Bitch.
MommyMelissa: whatever.

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Thanks Matt
Thanks Dan
Thanks Boners
Thanks Sara
Thanks Gerard
Thanks GoldenFiddle

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