Tuesday, October 11, 2005
There's this afternoon drive-time show in Detroit on the Talk Radio station that I really don't have anything against. It's your basic two jokey guys sitting in a studio, one says "I think cats are the best animal" and the other guy says "You're crazy, Dogs are the best" and then people call in for the next hour or so to say that dogs are better than cats, etc etc. It's jovial and fine...absolutely nothing wrong with it.
I don't usually catch it, but when I do, I've been amazed at how often they're going to commercial. It seems that any time you turn it on, it's either in commercial, or the one guy is saying "We've gotta take a break, we'll be right back."
In the interest of data I got out the analog stopwatch and timed an hour of the show, from 5:30 to 6:30.
This is what I found:
Radio :: 5:30:00 - 5:39:25 = 9:25
Commercial :: 5:39:25 - 5:48:35 = 8:10
Radio :: 5:48:35 - 5:59:50 = 11:15
Commercial :: 5:59:50 - 6:07:20 = 8:30
Radio :: 6:07:20 - 6:20:20 = 13:00
Commercial :: 6:20:20 - 6:28:45 = 8:25
Radio :: 6:28:45 - 6:30:00 = 1:15
Total Radio Time = 34:55
Total Commercials Time = 25:05
Is this how all radio shows are? Nearly 50% commercials? I dunno seems like a lot.
Great Chinese DVD bootleg tag line
Pretty hilarious reel of uncensored Full House bloopers, complete with swears and implied lesbianism.
"You can really see how little your dick is in that suit..." - Dave Coulier to Bob Saget
500 tidbits of rarely known pop music trivia (none of which is true):
8. In 1985 Bob Geldof spent 4 days bombarding Gene Vincent's management with requests for him to play Live Aid, before being told that Gene had died in 1971.
9. Phil Collins' unique drum-sound is a result of his having two left hands. The former Genesis frontman uses specially modified sticks to overcome his condition.
61. Aerosmith wrote "Love in an Elevator" after encountering Arthur Lee on the way up to a meeting at the offices of Sony Music in New York.
75. The Flaming Lips, sans Wayne Coyne, are the Residents. Coyne doesn't know.
86. Aretha Franklin is 35% nachos.
Note, this devolves into trivia about obscure British bands after a while.
Full sized Harpsichord made of Legos (it works and everything).
"I had hoped to reproduce a piano, but ditched the idea due to the enormous tension involved (40,000 lbs.)--there's a reason why pianos have steel frames. Its ancestor, the harpsichord, seemed more practically possible--the key/jack workings are simple levers, the strings are plucked, it's smaller, and it maintains less tension. Coincidentally, I was in my Bach phase anyways."
Things you'll never hear a southern boy say:
30. Oh I just couldn't - she's only sixteen.
29. I'll take Shakespeare for $1000, Alex.
28. Duct tape won't fix that.
27. Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken.
26. We don't keep firearms in this house.
25. You can't feed that to the dog.
24. No kids in the back of the pickup, it's just not safe.
23. Wrestling's fake.
22. We're vegetarians.
21. Do you think my gut is too big?
20. I'll have grapefruit and yogurt instead of biscuits and gravy.
19. Honey, we don't need another dog.
18. Who gives a damn about who won the Civil War?
17. Give me the small bag of pork rinds.
16. Too many deer heads detract from the decor.
15. I just couldn't find a thing at Wal-Mart today.
14. Trim the fat off that steak.
13. Cappuccino tastes better than espresso
12. The tires on that truck are too big.
11. I've got it all on the C: drive.
10. Unsweetened tea tastes better.
9. My fiancé, Bobbie Jo, is registered at Tiffany's
8. I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl.
6. She's too young to be wearing a bikini.
5. Hey, here's an episode of "Hee Haw" that we haven't seen.
4. I don't have a favorite college team.
3. You All.
2. Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Betty Mae.
And the #1 thing you never hear a Southern Boy say:
1. Nope, no more Jack Daniels for me. I'm driving.
Aardman Studios, home to Wallace & Grommit burned to the ground.
Thanks Exquisite Dead Guy