Tuesday, October 10, 2006

He Loves the Warm Feeling but He's Tired of all the Dehydration 



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Funny Fake Web 2.0 Logo Creatr
Complete with reflection and "Beta" stamp.

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Bedjump is photos of people in hotels jumping on beds.
It's the little things, really.

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I was just recalling all of the old Bob Newhart stand up routines where he's on the phone trying to explain Baseball for the first time and stuff like that, and I was wondering what it would sound like as the Dad one of the YouTube guys, trying to understand what his son is planning on doing for a living.

I think it would sound something like this:

[ring ring]

Hello?

Well, hey Chad! How are things going?

Good, good, Mom's fine...so, what have you been working on?

A website? Uh huh...

"U-Tube"? Like for plumbing?

Oh, "YouTube, I getcha. So not plumbing? 'Cause being a tradesman is a good field...

OK, so no plumbing...so what then?

Oh, Movies? Uh huh. Uh huh. What kind of movies? Like Casablanca or Forrest Gump?

Oh...independent movies?

Movies that are 10 seconds long...

What do you mean "lighting farts on fire?" You can do that?

Oh jeez, Chad, I dunno. How much do you think people are going to pay for this?

Free how? What do you mean free?

So let me get this straight: You want to have a website where anybody can put up their home movies, for free, of kids lighting farts on fire (which I'm still skeptical about), host possibly copyright-infringing music videos, and not charge anybody for it? What are your overhead costs?

200 terabytes of data per day and close to 2 million dollars a month in server costs? hoooo-kay.

Chad, what's your business model for this? Have you thought this through?

...

Right, like anybody would pay 1.65 billion dollars for videos of kids lighting their farts on fire. You're living in a dreamworld buddy! You enjoy making your mother cry don't you? Let's take a movie of that and put it on your website. "Mom Cries Because Her Son Is A Lunatic Movie" how does that sound, Chad? Maybe she can light her farts on fire too, what about that?

Chad?

Hello?

my son is dead to me.

[click]

Related: Bob Newhart hears The Aristocrats joke

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Fun movie where album covers come to life.
If gets a little bizarro when Ozzy starts biting the head off of everybody, but the animations are really well done.

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YouTube collection of girls with bouncy boobs winning on The Price Is Right.
Barker, you old dog.

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Indian(?)/Bollywood(?) version of Michael Jackson's Thriller.

Lego version of Michael Jackson's Thriller

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Sco-Jo = Esquire's Sexiest Woman Alive

Thanks Jared

More hott Esquire photos here.

Sluttier and surprisingly less interesting photos of Sco-Jo and a naked Dita Von Teese in faux-lesbian poses from Flaunt Magazine here.
Whooda thunk it? Seems pretty forced if you ask me.

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Thanks Jared
Thanks Mike
Thanks Exquisite Dead Guy
Thanks Rob
Thanks GoldenFiddle

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